Posted by Doyoo

I came across this guy who was married but complained he is not sexually satisfied, so we hooked up and became friends.we work together,he never told me that he was screwing another woman from work place and worst they had a baby. When l learned about it it he told me they are no longer together and that he doesn't love her. I fell in love with guy ,he could come to my place ,had fun it he never showed me his place the reason bring he dint want fights with his wife, l never pushed that through so l never asked about where he stay. There is a time l went home to check on my mom ,the guy used to sleep with my best friend they could cuddle and all those stuff for four days l was away ,he never told me either, he could have sex with my friend at workplacebehind my back just learned later. During Easter he came to stay at my place ,l welcome him but one day he was weird,he kissed career and fucjed in my friend as l was watching. That is too much trauma l have through. I forgave them after s talk things went back to normal. All the way l have suspecting that the guy us still moving on with his baby mama but he hid the truth ,l Everytime l asked him he would say he can't go back to her. Yesterday the guy came to my house course it is s norm we spend weekends together. He borrowed my phone and he gave me his . Just open what's app and see a lovey message he had texted his baby mama he won't go home he was caught in so much. I was so angry he lied to me. When l asked him he is he s been living with her for a while. I called off the relationship yesterday, we had a big argument almost burned my house down. I still love this guy,l work with him ,how should l behave now we broke up. How am l gong to handle job and seeing him with his baby mama at work place given they always talk native to hurt me,laugh at me .


Hello Doyoo,

I am sorry for what you have gone and going through. Relationship can be tough sometimes, it becomes more complicated when you are dating a colleague as you will have to see the person on daily basis. However that does not mean that you cannot move. Dealing with a break up is never easy, healing process as well may take time. So take each day as it is.
Here are some tips on how to move;-
1. Accept that the relationship has come to an end. No matter how bitter you are, feeling of betrayal, accepting helps you to heal.
2. Surround yourself we people that care about you and those that love you. This a good support system, they will be there when you need a shoulder to lean on.
3. Find a hobby or something you love doing. It could be cooking, writing, travelling. This will keep engaged in constructive things.
4. Even at break up there are things that you treasure about the relationship, therefore appreciate the good times you spent together.
5. You may consider seeking counselling services to help you through.
Considering that this is your colleague, perhaps you may consider taking some time off work, reflect and relax.
Check out this article with some tips on dealing with a break up:
This article will also be an opener on how to deal with a relationship with a colleague:

All the best.

Love Matters Team.