Relationships

Posted by Janet Njuguna Wahu

Hey,am Janet.I have been dating this guy for 2yrs now...The first 1yr and ahalf was okey but we started having issues and he went silent for a month...He then came back and asked that we meet and talk.We met and had sex but i noticed he had alot of pics for a certain chick...When i asked he told me that it's nothibg they are judt friends!!i even found cloths for a chick in his house.Now recently he just texted me that we should end everythg since he is not seeing any future with me!!I didn't reply and i decided to let him be.am i doing the right thing?

Answer
0

Hi Wahu,

Sorry that your relationship did not work out. The truth is there is no right or wrong way of breaking up for most people because its always a painful experience.

What you need to be concentrating on instead is healing and moving on from that relationship.

Think about what went wrong, but don't obsess over it. Don't fight your feelings - accept them, and let them out gently. It can be hard to stop thinking about it, but try to take your mind off it as much as you can. Remember that your end goal is to move on.

Meet with friends and share your feelings. There’s no better cure for a broken heart than sharing your feelings with good friends. You can meet for an evening beer or wine and pour your heart out.

Get rid of negative emotions. If you still feel angry with your ex a few months after breaking up, remind yourself that it’s in the past now and it's time to let go. Get rid of things that remind you of your partner – things like the gifts they gave you or cards they made. It’s sad, but it can help you move on.

Care for yourself. Eat well, sleep well, and take lots of exercise. Do things that make you feel better – like going for a walk in the park or getting together with your family. A little bit of tender loving care goes a long way in the healing process.

Get a new hobby. Try learning how to cook Thai food or play the piano. Find things to do to fill in spare time. Keeping your mind and body busy is an essential part of healing. You might also meet new people with similar interests when you join a group or club.

Be positive. It might sound unbelievable, but it's perfectly possible that you’ll find someone else who’ll love you again.

Don’t turn to drink or drugs. Stay away from alcohol and other unprescribed drugs. They’ll do you more harm than help you heal.

Watch out for signs of depression. If you think you’re falling into depression, let someone know. Get help. Contact helplines or counsellors. Below is a list that will help you.

If you feel you need to talk to some one about it, call any of these numbers for assistance. Amani Counselling Centre: 0722626590
Kenya Marriage Counselling: 0721743977
Oasis Counselling Center: 0733366614
Discovery Counselling Services: 0700270983/0721513438 .